Cromarty teenager shares experience of losing cousin to suicide at age 9
A CROMARTY teenager (16) has spoken out about what it felt like as a 9-year-old when she lost her older cousin to suicide.
Orlagh MacIver, who has won awards for her contributions to youth work on the Black Isle, has opened up alongside her mum Sarah in a new Mikeysline podcast titled Speaking of Suicide.
Beginning her time at the Cromarty Youth Cafe aged four, Orlagh has now gained over 888 hours of volunteering work for her Saltire Award. In November, she went on to be awarded the prestigious Eric Lidell accolade from none other than Princess Anne, to celebrate her “remarkable” contributions to youth work.
The episode, titled ‘How do you explain suicide to a curious child?’, explores what it was like for Orlagh to lose her big cousin Callum to suicide when she was nine-years-old.
In the podcast, Orlagh said: “You know, Callum was young. He wasn’t visibly unwell. To me, he seemed happy, you know, like he was healthy. So I kind of didn’t understand, because I just thought that you got old and you passed away with age, or you could get really ill and you would pass away. So I didn’t really understand how it had happened to him.”
Sarah, Orlagh’s mum also shared her experience on how to navigate explaining Callum’s death to young Orlagh, saying: “Although I didn’t know much of what was going on, I knew that she had to be told immediately because I just didn’t want to confuse her even more of why people were so upset, and it was just a case of ‘she needs told’.”
Orlagh continued: "How was a nine-year-old supposed to feel? I didn't know what to say or think. I was emotionless at the time...everyone around me crumbled down in sadness, crying, deafening wailing, some pacing the floor, leaving the room. I thought I had to be like them. I thought ‘am I supposed to cry?’
“I'm not sure how long it took, but when it sunk in, I felt sad. Really, really sad. My mind couldn't understand what had happened to Callum, but I knew I'd never ever see him again"
The description of the podcast episode states: “In this hugely insightful and thought-provoking conversation, Orlagh talks about her curiosity and need to understand what had happened and Sarah explains how she ended up explaining the nature of Callum’s death to her daughter. Seven years down the line the legacy of Callum’s death has left a clear impact on both Orlagh and Sarah, but Orlagh remains profoundly grateful for her family’s honesty and open-ness in allowing her to process the reality of Callum’s death in her own way and time.
Listen to the podcast episode on https://tinyurl.com/r7fsnex2
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