Highland mother forgives bullies in bid to ensure her daughter's life was not in vain
THE mother of teenager Jade McGrath, whose body was found in woodland on the outskirts of Inverness, has forgiven those who bullied her daughter.
The 19-year-old was found in December about half-a-mile from New Craigs psychiatric hospital where she was being treated for severe anxiety. She had been reported missing several days earlier.
Her mother Samantha Taylor said her daughter had recently been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder which she believed could be traced back to her being bullied as a child.
Miss McGrath, from Aviemore, had attended Grantown Grammar School and later Millburn Academy in Inverness.
Mrs Taylor posted on Facebook: "To all of you who excluded/bullied/verbally or physically assaulted Jade McGrath at Carrbridge Primary, Grantown Grammar and Millburn HS between 2010 and 2015. You know who you are.
"As everyone now knows, she took her own life at the end of November last year.
"I want you to know a few things: The damage that you did to her self esteem was profound and long-lasting. Although she fought hard and valiantly to over come the damage that you caused, in the end she lost her fight, just when she seemed to be finally turning a corner.
"She never got a chance to do her exams at Millburn because she was too terrified to go to school. That meant no college, so no qualifications, so she was forced to do unskilled low-paid jobs.
"As a result of her sensitive gentle nature, she found it hard to recover from the bullying and abuse that you inflicted on her. She developed mental health and behavioural problems which were related to her poor self esteem. Until the bullying started, her self esteem was fine.
"Eventually, she was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder as a result of this trauma in her early years. It is estimated that up to 10 per cent of BPD sufferers complete suicide.
"I also want you to know this: I forgive you.
"I forgive you, Because you were only young when you inflicted this damage, too young to understand what you were doing.
"I know that you will always have the guilt of knowing that you were a contributing factor in our precious Jade's early demise, and that is punishment enough.
"So I am not writing this post out of hatred or revenge. Instead of adding to your pain by blaming you, I want to ask you to do something for Jade, in her honour and her memory. I want you to always make the time in your life to help the people that you go to college or uni with, or work with - people like Jade.
"Gentle, sensitive, quirky people who have trouble fitting in, or try too hard to fit in because they don't think they are good enough just as they are.
"Go out of you way to include them, give them compliments, boost their self confidence and self esteem. Be kind to them and support them.
"Even if you don't feel like doing this, do it any way, do it for Jade and all of the other young people who suffered and died the way she did. And when you become parents yourselves, please, please teach your kids to be kind to their classmates.
"Explain to them that some people take things to heart more than they should, so it's important to be gentle, kind, and inclusive.
"Teach them not to turn a blind eye when they see a classmate being bullied. Make them understand that by observing bullying or exclusion but doing nothing about it, they become complicit in it.
"Lead by example, show your kids how to live with compassion and integrity by living that way yourself.
"Jade was a special girl. Before the bullying started, she was a normal happy kid. She was loads of fun, sharp witted, lively and hilarious. To see her crumble, slowly, (with plenty of peaks and troughs) over the last six years of her life has broken our hearts, permanently.
"We love her and miss her so much."
