Inverness pub Johnny Foxes manager Andy Gill delighted to become the Joey Tribbiani of his friends group after setting out on path to become humanist celebrant

Having worked his way up to management level at Johnny Foxes, a couple of years ago Andy Gill decided to embark on a different journey – becoming a humanist celebrant.

The idea was planted in his head by a pair of engaged friends who noted how exciting it would have been if he was able to marry them in the same way Joey Tribbiani did for two different couples in the legendary sitcom Friends.

Unfortunately it is not as simple as it was for the TV show character, as Mr Gill has had to go through years of training and accreditation to be allowed to conduct weddings.

In itself, becoming a celebrant could be seen as a stark change in several ways. As part of the LGBTQ+ community, Mr Gill is one of many who have a minimal relationship with religion and traditional churches, but upon discovering humanism it immediately felt like a good fit.

“The journey for me has been growing up in an area where you would go to some religious funerals and leave not hearing many stories about the individual,” he reasoned.

“If you only had time to nip to the service, you wouldn’t really know much about someone’s life. Unfortunately it’s more through funerals that I learned about humanism, but people would hear stories and then get up and add their bit in. For me, that was so much more personal.

“You learn a lot more about the person through a humanist funeral than any I’d been to before. Humanism isn’t anti-religious either, it’s just not religious.

“There is something for everyone at a humanist ceremony, which from an LGBTQ+ stance is nice because we’re not always welcome in religious centres.

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“That was never going to be a route for me, but humanism is welcoming for all, so we can conduct civil partnerships and weddings in a way where it’s more about people than anything else.

“I just want to do good to others, because we’re all human and we all want everyone to do better for that reason. It’s not something I spend a lot of time thinking about, because I just want what’s best for everybody.

“I don’t feel there needs to be any idea behind it that’s pushing it other than being citizens of the world, really.”

Mr Gill is well used to working with the public at Johnny Foxes, and having taken on fundraising challenges like Ness Factor, Strictly Inverness and most recently Stars In Their Eyes, he is also no stranger to performing in front of people.

Being a celebrant is some combination of both of those sides of his previous experience, albeit there are some significant differences too.

“The pace is very different,” he explained.

“If we’re doing a wedding, you meet up with a bride and groom when their wedding is two years away. Then you meet up with them again a few months before and start writing their story.

“At Foxes, you start at 5pm and it’s crazy busy until you’ve cleaned up, packed up and are out of there at 3.30am.

“A lot of the lessons that I’ve learned in hospitality are definitely transferrable though. Customer service, being able to react quickly – sometimes I’ll get an email the night before a wedding asking for changes, so being able to adjust is a skill that I can take into this role.

“You also really don’t know what’s going to happen when you first pick up that phone to have a conversation with a family or a couple. You need to be able to adjust your tone to have those conversations, but that has become second nature.

“A performance is the right way of describing it, and every ceremony is so different from the last. I certainly haven’t done any two funerals that have been the same, and I don’t have any two weddings that are the same coming up either.

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“That’s what I love about it. We are all so different, and that’s something the LGBTQ+ community celebrates anyway, so being able to go into my job and do that with people from all walks of life is exciting.

“To celebrate our differences is what makes us all unique. No matter how shy some people are, they still want to show off and be different to everyone else. That celebration is what makes us all unique.”

Now that he is beginning to settle into the role of being a celebrant, Mr Gill can start planning for the future – and fulfilling the role that sparked this entire journey.

“I have my first friends’ wedding coming up in May next year,” Mr Gill added.

“The two that originally approached me about it have already got married, because we didn’t know how long the process would take, but I still did a reading for them.

“Actually, my first two weddings are friends, and from there it has built arms and legs and grown from there. I am now the Joey of my friend group!”

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